Advice For Moving On After A Breakup

You and your partner have decided to call the relationship quits and move on; however, you are not quite sure where to start. For several months or years, you were part of a team, a partnership, and now you find yourself flying solo. You wonder where to go next.

Here are some tips for moving on after a breakup that may help you make the transition from part of a couple to a single person again smooth.

First, accept the fact that you are solo again. You can’t move on if you haven’t accepted that the relationship is over. This is not an easy thing to do (especially if you were in a very long term relationship). It may take you some time before you accept that it really is over. For quite some time, you may have hopes that you will get back together. You may also be planning ways to win your partner back. Each day, you will be faced with the reality that the relationship is no more.

Next in moving on after a breakup, look at the things that you did that contributed to the breakup. While this may not help heal the current breach, it can help you when you enter into a new relationship with someone else. Look at the things that you did that may have caused conflicts in the partnership and how you can avoid those things in future relationships.

Practice forgiveness for both you and your ex. Until you can forgive the both of you, you will harbor resentment and pain. Forgiveness is a wonderful way to heal your heart and give yourself permission to move on.

As part of moving on after a breakup, remember to give yourself time to get over the break. Allow yourself to grieve. A breakup can affect you much like the death of a loved one (especially when your partner moves on and finds someone else and you reach a point where you realize he / she will never be part of your life again). Cry if you want to. Journal about your feelings. Allow yourself to grow stronger.

Don’t jump immediately into a new relationship. This isn’t fair to you or your new partner. You want to make sure that you give yourself time to be stronger when you enter into a new partnership with someone else.

While moving on after a breakup, do not isolate yourself. Hang out with friends and family and plan fun activities that are not “date” related. Let friends and family know what you are going through. Be cautious, however, because friends and family may try to pressure you into a new relationship before you are ready in the hope it will “take your mind off what’s-his-name.” Give yourself permission to go out and have fun.

As you are moving on after a breakup, when you are ready, start dating again. Take these dates slow, however, because you are still healing. Allow yourself the privilege of having a good time and enjoying the company of another potential life partner.

A breakup doesn’t have to be the end of the world. While it is a trying and sad time, there are things you can do to make it a bit easier on yourself. By following these tips on moving on after a breakup, you can grow stronger and get back out there and find the one meant for you.